Wish For a Second Chance
by EmptyUniverse
Summary: Season 6 canon divergence Slow burn Outlaw Queen, with a slight love triangle between Robin, Regina and the EQ. No Zelena.
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1

The air buzzes with electricity, there's a crack of noise that breaks the silence of the night. Robin merges from the portal. Regina lets out the breath she didn't know she was holding in, she turns to him and can't stop how her arms wrap around him and hold him tight. "I thought you didn't make it, it's been minutes" the hug is a long one, she just can't let go, afraid that if she did something will come and snatch him up, like that damn fury. She lets him go and steps away, all to aware of the space between them. "I'm sorry" She feels a flush of embarrassment, she's only known this man for a couple of hours.

"It's alright." The way he looks at her, so understanding, it's like he knows her pain. For a split second Regina forgets that this man is not hers.

"So where are we?" Robin looks around, he's in a forest, but it's not the same as any he'd ever seen in the EF, he looks up to try to get his bearings by the stars but he can't see any, only a small few, everything is bright and loud, there is noise he just barely can hear… it's a humming, a static humming that runs up his spine and into his temples. This world doesn't smell the same, the air is thick, not like the fresh air he's used to and he has a slight feeling like he can't breathe but then she smiles at him, leads him to a clearing that overlooks a village of lights. He's doub-founded, so many torches- "Robin of Locksley, welcome to Storybrooke" Regina is beaming with pride, her smile lights up the forest and even though this world is strange and Robin feels out of place, he will try to adjust, even if it's just for her.

She tries to explain to him how the lights work, while he follows her through the forest- not magic but electricity, no flame but an invisible power that illuminates glass bulbs, Robin is not new to magic but magic on this grand scale leaves him a bit in awe.

As they turn onto Mifflin Street, Regina lets out a mini sigh of relief, walking all day in heeled boots has made her cranky and she would love nothing more than a hot soak in her tub and her feather bed. "You live here?" Robin asks in amazement, she doesn't need to reply as she unlatches the front gate and walks through, he follows her. "You must be pretty important." he muses.

"I'm the mayor of this town." She says with bit of a smile, she may not be proud of what she did in the Enchanted Forest, but this place is her baby and she's damn proud of it.

Her pride is short lived, "Did _he_ live here too?" he asks curiously.

"We only had a small amount of time to live together before he died, but yes." When her Robin had come back from New York, when they did decide that they were in it together, they both had expected that they could just settle down and forget about what happened, there were moments when Regina let herself indulge in thinking about possibly living in this house, with him and their children for the rest of their lives, for always, such a pipe dream it was in hindsight.

"Lucky man" Robin says under his breath- _how bad could this be?_

Entering the house, Regina makes him take his shoes off on the mat and gestures that he follow, "I'll set up a room for you in the study, you can sleep there until you are settled."

Regina disappears up the stairs and reappears carrying an armful of sheets and a pillow. He takes them from her when she reaches the bottom, "here, I can help you with that." her eyes are beautiful and expressive he notices, well to be honest this isn't the first time he's noticed her eyes, the sadness in them, the pleading, this time he notices that for a split second they seem to be searching him desperately for _something -_ it makes him feel slightly uneasy. But then she's leading him to a room at the far end of the main floor. "I hope, this is okay, you can make up a bed on that couch, the lights turn on and off using this switch-" she demonstrates by flicking the switch on and off "-and the washroom is down the hall beside the kitchen, if you get hungry there is some food in the fridge, and if you need anything else I'll be upstairs."

"Thank you Regina, I'm sure I'll be fine." Robin smiles, it gives her a knot in her belly.

"Okay, well have a good night." Regina hesitantly turns away as he closes the door between them.

After climbing into bed her cell buzzes quietly on her nightstand making the wood vibrate. She reaches for it, grunts a little because it's slightly out of reach and she thinks about leaving it and curling up in her bed, she's waited all day for these crisp clean sheets and blissful sleep… but then damn thing is persistent, whoever is on the other line is desperate to get a hold of her, thinking it may be Henry she gives in a reaches for it.

 _Mary Margaret_ lights up on her caller ID.

She doesn't even bother answering with a formal greeting, "News travels fast." She says under her breath before answering. _At least it's not Henry,_ still it's late.

"Are you kidding, this is biggest thing to happen in a while… David left me a note telling me everything that happened … where is he?" Snow's been feeling a little left out bing on the 'the night shift' as her and David have resigned to calling their situation.

"He's set up in the study."

"Can I come over first thing tomorrow morning?" She's well rested and chirpy, but at least she's in good spirits considering that she is once again cursed, there is one thing Regina will admit she admires in Snow, regardless what happens to her she remains optimistic.

But still, even though this was a spontaneous turn of events, she's sure that this Robin wouldn't appreciate a an early morning gawker, even if she has good intentions. "He's not a circus attraction."

"I know but I thought you might want to talk about it. I'll be there early" Snow too bubbly and all Regina wants to do is sleep right now, she will say anything to make Snow shut up and let her sink back into bed…. _Wait how early is early._ "How early?"

"I have to wake David up for his shift at nine so eight?."

"Eight?!" Nope, nope, nope, she plans to still be sound asleep… sleep, oh god she just wants to sleep, Regina yawns, She has no energy to argue with Snow, who is well rested and in a better mindset for negotiation.

"I'm under a sleeping curse, this is only entertainment I have on the night shift." Whatever, as long as you stop talking right now and let me sleep, Regina thinks but she can only mumble, "Fine… but I'm not your personal soap opera." Snow says something in retort but by then Regina's head has hit the pillow and everything's gone black, there's a faint " _Hello? Regina?._ " before beep beep beep, she's too far gone to care.

/

Tick

Tick

Tick

Tick

The sound reverberates in Robin's head, the sound is loud and unrelenting. It's too bright, he's not used to this much light, there are torches- _no lights_ outside that are constantly burning. It makes it damn hard for him to sleep, the internal ticking coming from some contraption making it even harder for him to keep his sanity. So Robin doesn't sleep, not really.

This place is a far cry from what he's used to and in the dead of night, and the ticking becoming increasingly unbearable, he thinks that maybe this was a bad idea. But then he thinks of Regina's sad eyes, when she looks at him, she's so beautiful, if any version of him was that lucky enough to love someone like her, he could certainly tough out these inconveniences just for a shot at the same.

When the sun starts to lighten up the horizon and the thing that was ticking away all night comes to life and starts screaming he damn near loses all the patience he has not to storm out, thankfully Regina comes in a moment later and turns the wretched thing off but he's still on edge.

As much as this seemed like a good turn of events last night, he's feeling more cooped up and irritated by the second.

/

Snow shows up fifteen minutes early. It's a good thing Regina has always been a bit of a morning owl, well that and she's been getting up at the crack of dawn since Henry was a baby so it's become almost like an everyday habit to rise with the sun. She's dressed and makeup and hair done long before seven thirty. She has enough time to put on a pot of tea, check on Robin, who's also awake, woken up by an alarm clock, she makes her apologies and brings him some clean clothes, some things of Robin's that she's hoping will fit him. By then Snow has made herself a tea and set herself up in the dining room.

"I know you already know this, but he can't replace Robin." Snow before Regina even has a chance to sit down with her at the table.

"I know. I'm not replacing anyone. " Regina says a bit defensively.

Thankfully Snow doesn't choose to dwell on that topic, "Okay then, so I guess now that is out of the way….. Why did you bring him here?"

"He wanted a fresh start, he was kind of a bad guy in his world and he would have ended up ether dead or on the run because of me." Regina fiddles with the handle of her cup, it's too hot to drink so she fidgets, turns it slightly back and tries to decide if the feeling she currently feels is a bit of shame or regret or both.

"Oh so you decided to bring this 'bad guy' here.?" Snow's tone is a bit accusatory, but not in a very serious way. It's not like Robin is on par with any of the other threats they are currently dealing with, like her double, who she's be notified has been turned into a snake and it currently being kept in the Charmings Loft…. Why they would choose to keep her so close is beyond logic.

"He's not 'bad', he's made poor choices in his world but it's not any different than me, you trusted me too when you shouldn't have.." She really should have thought of the consequences of bringing Robin back to this world, of course Snow would question her choices by at the time they seemed like the most human thing to do, even Emma was encouraging, it's not like she made the decision for him, he chose to come here, "...maybe I want to have _hope_ that there is a good man in him." There is absolutely nothing in his behavior she's seen that suggests that he's anything but maybe rough around the edges and a bit selfish. He decided to trust her after all, gave her his lucky feather, thinking about that makes her cheeks flush a bit.

Snow looks at her with a sly smile, Regina catches it when she looks up. It's pointed, Snow wanted her to notice it, like she's calling her out, "What?" "why are you looking at me like that?"

'Oh no reason….." Snow takes a smug sip of tea, takes a few seconds longer, to keep her friend in suspense. "A year ago a certain thief may have thought the same about a former Evil Queen." Regina scoffs, then her mood shifts to something a bit sad. "If only we hadn't spent so much time fighting, then maybe we could have had more time together."

"Don't beat yourself up over that, we were all going through hard times in the Missing Year, it's not your fault." Snow says sympathetically.

'I know," it was her fault, Regina knows she wasn't in the right mindset for love then, and he was very trusting of her, almost too trusting. She treated him poorly and he had no right to think of her as anything but ornery and unapproachable. She vows to herself not to do the same to Wish Robin. She would try to understand him, to accept him as he is.

"Regina, I trust your instincts, if you think he deserves a chance, then he does. I'm just worried." Snow reaches across the table and grabs Regina's hand, Regina briefly wonders how they got to this point, to where they could hold hands like best friends, Snow gives her hand a squeeze then retreats, drinks more of her tea… she's thinking, her forehead always scrunches when she thinks, "Have you told him he has a son?"

For a moment Regina is speechless,'Roland isn't his son." She's thought about Roland, in the dungeon when Robin was asking about his doubles life, she could not tell him about his son, it's not that she didn't think it was relevant, but because there was a flicker of something dark, not jealousy but possessiveness. "Also he's in another realm and… telling him would…. maybe he'd want to be there instead of here."

"You can't keep it from him in good conscious, it would be his choice if he wants to get to know a son he could have had with the woman he loved."Snow studies Regina for a moment, waiting for her response, there's something else there, maybe judgement, Regina can't decide.

"I know, I'll tell him, I just need to find the right moment."

Their conversation is halted when Robin opens the door to the study and steps out, seeing him nearly knocks the air out of Regina. Seeing him in Robin's clothes is almost too much. She mentally kicks herself for giving him Robin's clothes, she should have went out and got him some new ones, ones that don't tug at her heart and remind her of what she's lost.

Snow clears her throat to break the silence, She gives Regina _that look_ again, just to hit home the conversation they just had. Then she gets up from the table, makes a polite exit "Well, I better be going. Time to get back to sleep." before leaving Robin and Regina alone in their awkwardness.

/

"Are you hungry?" Regina smiles and places a plate in front of him. The smell of bacon immediately dulling his earlier annoyance and bad night. It's not often he'd get bacon back in the Enchanted forest. Maybe occasionally in a tavern if they had a pig roasting on the fire. But this is different, everything here is different, he's become to accept _different_ as his new reality.

He'd moved into the room off the entrance way where he could sit and let her say goodbye to a woman who bears an uncanny resemblance to Queen Snow White, another thing that catches Robin off guard about this place.

The food was a likely a peace offering after the rough start to the morning he had. He's willing to put it all behind him and get to know her. He tries to be as polite as he can as he devours the helping of bacon and eggs in front of him. He eats like this is the first meal he's had in ages, it's not far off.

He was going to ask if she's like to sit, but she beats him to the punch, "I was hoping we could talk." he watches her sit down beside him, he is distracted by her, watches how she carefully glides her hand behind her to smooth her dress before sitting, or how she then presses her hand to her abdomen, in a way that seems both practiced and like she's preparing for the worst, he's gobsmacked by her beauty "or not, I just thought that might have questions."

He doesn't really have questions for her, not ones that they haven't already covered, like about how this new world works. He supposes he is a bit curious about the man that she loved, or how she could love a man like him.

She reaches for a book he didn't notice before, sitting on the table in front of them,"I have this book, it might help you know the man that Robin was, it has all his stories." Regina turns the story book to the page depicting Robin and Marian's wedding and pushes it across the coffee table so it's in front of him.

Robin sees the picture of Marian, stares at it for a few moments, it's been a long time since he'd seen her face, and this image, of their apparent wedding stirs something in him, anger mostly, and regret. He has anger towards this man who is not him, for being so lucky, for having everything that he lost, for having everything he could ever want. He tries his best to hide it, to push it down into some deep dark place where it belongs. There is hope there too, they haven't really discussed Marian, just in passing, there is a sudden swell of hope in his chest that maybe in this land she's still alive. "You said you knew Marian, is she here too?"

/

The pang of possessiveness Regina has returns briefly, but she finds a way to stamp it down. Her heart may be free of darkness but she's not absolved from her natural dark impulses.

"No" In hindsight, if the real Marian had come back, it would have been better for them in the long run, what's one dead wife when you have true love? Regina muses. She dares to think that maybe if had it really been Marian who came back all those months ago maybe her Robin would still be here with her, Regina picks her words carefully, this Robin doesn't need to know all the horrible details. "She died long ago too, long before we all came here. Robin spoke of her a lot. She was quite an inspiration to him. She made him the hero he was." she watches him as he lowers his head, defeated.. It just then occurs to her that's maybe why he came here, for Marian and not for her, she feels embarrassed and stupid.

He looks up at her, his blue eyes filled with a bit of sadness, "You seem like you've turned your life around too?" The way he looks at her, makes it hard for her to keep eye contact. He's so genuine, curious. She wonders just how much he knows about the Evil Queen in his realm.

"Yes, he helped show me the best person I could be, he showed me that I was worthy of love." The air between them becomes too thick, the silence is deafening. Regina knows that this is a bit too personal, she really shouldn't be telling him this. He's curious, and patient and he makes her think that this vulnerability she she feels is okay.

There is a lightness about her now that the Evil Queen is gone, but it's laced with timidness, she misses her edge, her fire, she doesn't feel as deeply as she used to. Robin was the one who saw past the darkness but even he appreciated her 'boldness' that the queen brought. Regina wonders how her Robin would have reacted to her cutting out her darkness, would she have even needed to if he was still here? No, with him she didn't need to be anything but who she was. She admits that cutting out the dark part of herself is something she did because she was grieving the loss of him. She regrets having done anything so drastic.

"The story of you and him, it's not in the book." Robin tries to break the awkward silence, the dead weight hanging over them. It pulls he back to the present, he's looking at her imploringly. But still, she doesn't really know what to say.

"No, I suppose it's not." Regina says mournfully.

He seems to understand, he says a bit regretfully, "You will have to tell me about it sometime."

/

Robin flips through the book landing on a page highlighting Robin Hood's exploits, a page of script with a drawing of Robin Hood and the Merry Men sharing what seems like a fair amount of gold with poor villagers, that kind of gold could have set him up nicely and here is the image of himself giving it away like it were nothing, "Everything is so different here, I can't imagine myself doing any of these things."

This man is not him, he's sitting here with the Evil Queen who is not evil, not like he remembers her, he wonders if everyone in this land is the better versions of the people in his land. Flips the page, sees Nottingham, wonders if he's some pinnacle of heroism in this backwards land too. He flips through the book, gets to that part where something is the same, see's who he knows as the Evil Queen threatening a group of peasants in a village, "Is this you?"

"A long time ago yes, but I'm sure that the version of me that you know is quite different."

The Queen he knew in his world was cold and malicious, She had hunted Snow White but had been defeated and banished to another realm, after that no one cared to even think about what had happened to the Evil Queen, he supposes she must have died somewhere. "Queen Snow, she defeated you. It's hard not to feel puzzled after seeing the two of you talking this morning. In my land you were sworn enemies."

"We were in mine as well, but things have come along way."

"The tales about you in my world… well, you surprise me." He hadn't seen the Queen many times in his experience, or even that close. But in the height of her reign of terror he always felt a connection to her, he spent a great amount of time pissed off at the world and fate that had failed him, and seeing others get magical intervention, he can't say it didn't bother him, so when one day when this fiery queen showed up and threatened to destroy everyone's happy endings, he's a bit ashamed to admit that he was rooting for her.

"Me? why would I surprise you?" Regina's expression is one of shock and confusion.

Robin shrugs, "you took what you wanted"

"you didn't see me as a villain?"

Somehow she's not put off but the revelation that he admired the Evil Queen, and that makes him more trusting of her, she's not utterly repulsed by him, which he was expecting, Maybe this will work. If she was even half the Evil Queen he knew then maybe she wouldn't look down on him, maybe the could find some fire in common. He decides to test this possible connection, he dares to lean slightly closer to her, "Bold, maybe, and ruthless, but fierce." she's look at him again with her sad hurting eyes, but there is something else there too, a hint of fire. Her eyes fall to his lips, he thinks about kissing her, "I want to get to know you, all of you." He whispers between them.

She leans forward closing the distance between them...

 _Ding dong_


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

The sound of the doorbell makes them both jump.

The door clicks open, "Hey mom." Henry's voice sounds from the entrance way. Regina stiffens and pulls away leaving Robin confused and a bit flustered. She can feel her cheeks blooming with embarrassment.

"In here Henry." She stands, trying to put some much needed distance between her and Robin, she doesn't want to give Henry the wrong impression. It dawns on her that Henry might have questions and she hadn't exactly had the time to explain to him the whole situation, and knowing her son, he's still very protective of his mother.

Regina looks over at Robin who, looks puzzled to say the least, she doesn't quite remember if she's had the chance to tell him about her child yet, and is suddenly self conscious "I didn't get a chance tell you about my son."

Henry comes through the room, and to Regina's utter lack of surprise greets Robin like he's probably already been given the run down on the situation by Snow.

"Hey" Henry greets Robin casually from the doorway to the living room.

"Henry, this is Robin Locksley." Henry gives him a simple half wave, which Robin returns.

"I know grandma told me, it's nice to meet you." It's not as awkward as Regina was scared it would be. Henry's a good kid, and he's been around so much magic that he doesn't even bat an eyelash anymore at the strange things that happens to his family on a regular basis, and for that Regina is relieved.

"I was just stopping in to grab my DS, Grandpa asked me to watch baby Neal for a bit, If i'm going to be trapped in the loft for a few hours I want something to keep me busy when the baby naps." He shrugs, Regina contemplates if Snow actually put him up to coming here so she can have some more juicy scoop when she wakes up.

He gives her a look- _grandma most definitely put him up to this_ "Mom wants to take me boating tomorrow and I thought I'd grab some warmer clothes too." Henry starts bounding up the stairs two at a time.

"Alright sweetheart." Regina says to his retreating form.

It doesn't take long for Henry to grabs his things and leave, giving his mom a quick hug and whispering- _No matter what, I trust you._ It warms her heart to know that she has his support no matter how difficult and bizarre this situation is and it gives her renewed confidence but that doesn't help that it killed the mood a bit with Robin.

"I'm sorry about that." she says when she re-enters the room.

"You never mentioned a son. Does he not live with you?" She knows that blindsided him a bit, there was so much she wanted to tell him but they hadn't had much time to talk about anything.

"He does but he lives with his other mother as well…. I'm his adopted mother."

"You never had children of your own?"

"No, It's…. A long story." She makes her way back to sit next to him on the couch but there's awkward space between them, or it just feels heavy. Regina regrets that he decided to follow a stranger to a new world without really knowing anything about her and he deserves to know just what he's getting himself into.

"I see." Robin seems a bit remorseful and a bit cold, "I was never really big on having children, never really really was something I was interested in, I never thought I'd make a good father anyways. " Regina feels guilty at that, thoughts of a curly brown haired little boy flood her thoughts. Her Robin had been a good father, a natural. She should tell this Robin about Roland. Maybe it would make a difference- but maybe she rationalizes, it might make things worse, in the moment she decides against telling him at least for a bit, it has to come out eventually…. But not today.

"Do you want to see the town?" That seems to cut the tension between them a bit, his guard is still up. They still have so much to iron out before this can be something, but a distraction will help break the ice.

"Well if this is my new home then I would like to see what this place has to offer."

/

They have lunch at Granny's. Regina is so intent on showing him around this noisy little hamlet and he admits it's not so bad, he's starting to get used to the noise and the smells, he misses the forest but but with Regina beside him occasionally looking at him and smiles he finds it easy to forget that, just a day ago he was stealing to make a few coins and sleeping in the dirt. As they walk down the street, Robin sees a face he was hardly expecting to see and it makes his blood instantly boil….Nottingham.

"You didn't tell me he was here." Robin's voice goes ice cold.

Regina notices the other man walking down the street on the opposite side, and he sees panic in her eyes. Robin hears her call out to him as he starts walking to cut the other man off but in his anger he's all but blocked her out. The only thing he cares about right now is giving that son of a bitch a good punch. Robin gets a jolt of satisfaction when his hand collides with the other man's cheek with a loud smack and knocking him down to the ground.

It takes Nottingham a couple seconds to realize what hit him, "What the fuck?" Nottingham scrambles to get up, having been blindsided by Robin's right hook. His coffee spilled all over the asphalt. When he sees Robin's face his goes white in fear. "You died, how the Hell are you back here."

Regina's hand grabs Robin's wrist, and she grabs it tightly. He thinks she's trying to stop him from throwing another punch but it wouldn't stop him if he wanted to pummel the weasel into the damn ground, he deserves it for what he did, but then he hears her voice, 'Robin stop, I'm sorry, I should have told you- I didn't actually think …"Then she shifts her focus to Nottingham, she's trying to apologise to him and help him up and that makes him even angrier that she's helping him of all people. Just yesterday Nottingham was willing to let them both rot in a cell, but then he remembers that was another Nottingham, this is another realm entirely and it seems to cool his head a bit but he's still angry. Angry at himself for coming here, a bit angry at her for not giving him fair warning that prick was alive and well here too.

He needs to cool off, she's pulling him down some side road, away from his enemy still trying to right himself on the side of the road where Robin left him bleeding. Robin becomes aware that his knuckles are burning, a quick look down confirms they are split and bleeding as well. Regina says something about knowing a place they can go away from people where she can heal his wounds but he just follows. She leads him to a graveyard and they to a crypt. He's too flustered to notice the headstone but the vault she leads them to which reads _Robin Hood,_ it's a good thing because at that point he'd just lose it.

When his pulse normalizes and the anger boils off him, and he can finally pay attention to her again, she's wiping the blood from his knuckles with a wet cloth, she seems to be just as agitated as he is but she's not turning him out on his heel just yet for his behaviour so there's something good at least.

"He's different here." She tries to sympathize but then she scoffs like even she doesn't believe herself," well not really he's still a sexist self important asshole." she wipes away more blood "but he's not a threat." she says matter of fact.

Now it's Robin who is scoffing, "He seemed awfully threatening just now."

Regina looks up at him,"Well to be fair, he didn't really expect that you'd be here. The Robin he knows is dead." Her shoulders fall heavy, he wonders if she's doubting her decision to invite him here. If he's honest with himself he's a bit upset with her for not mentioning that there were threats to him in this world too, but maybe it was different. He was the one who struck Nottingham first after all. The whole idea of a life so different than his own makes him unsettled, at least where he's from he knew who the enemy was.

"Did he have a go at him too?" He can't image a life in which Nottingham wasn't a pain in his ass.

"No, they just ignored each other for the most part, we didn't really have time to deal with Nottingham and all his issues." But they must have had issues, but her Robin didn't lose Marian to him like he had. Thinking of Marian even after so long… it's a wound that never fully healed, "He makes me so mad, I could just…" Robin becomes acutely aware that Regina is holding his hand in hers, it's the first time in a long time that anyone's shown him even an ounce of care and it suddenly becomes too much, so he pulls away from her.

"Why? What did he-?"

Robin grits his teeth, says under his breath, "That snake took Marian."

"She wanted someone who was noble" He doesn't want her to pity him, hopes that she doesn't at this momentary weakness, there were many reasons why Marian chose Nottingham over him if he's being honest, but instead he deflects "...I could never understand why she would choose someone like him." He shakes out his hand, it's still stiff and sore, she must notice because she's reaching for it again only this time, there is a flash of purple light as her hand grazes his knuckles and the pain subsides to a slight itch then dissipates entirely. He clenches his fist, still no pain. Powerful magic.

"Someone who wasn't a two bit thief with nothing to offer but a life on the run?" Her response is steeped in sarcasm and he knows not to take it as anything but an honest observation. He probably didn't have much to offer Marian. He doesn't really have anything to offer Regina, and that realization makes him self conscious. He begins to wonder what his other self had that he didn't. How did he turn it all around..

"Well when you put it that way." he says dryly. Robin takes a minute to take in the surroundings not that his anger has worn off. He knew they had entered a cemetery and this was obviously a crypt, but it wasn't littered with corpses but rather strange boxes, bottles with potions, and books and candles. This is her space, it's a dark space, it doesn't seem to fit the life of the Regina standing in front of him. "What is this place?" he asks.

"It's where I go to think, or when i just want to get away from everyone." she mumbles. He notices a box full of not so innocent looking potions and wonders if maybe Regina is hiding some dark secrets in this place.

"What's in the boxes?" He points to a few of the boxes that have a faint red glow.

"Well-" she stammers, "they are the hearts of my enemies" she damn near makes the last bit incoherent with a hushed tone. She shifts her eyes to the floor and pushes her hair behind her ear. She's ashamed and a bit embarrassed like he just caught her stealing but that just makes affection bloom somewhere deep in his gut.

"Right… and here you are judging me and my lifestyle." he says a bit playfully, a bit sarcastic. Turnabout is fair play right? The anger in him has all but faded, replaced with a bit of a low simmer of a spark of interest for her.

"I'm not judging, If I had any judgement of your 'lifestyle' I would never have fallen in love with a different version of you." She gives him a small half smile, if want's to know what it would be like to kiss her, now's the best time he thinks, so he leans in, she anticipates it and leans in as well, and he goes for it.

/

It's a kiss. A soft press of lips, it's gentle but not passionate, it's underwhelming. It doesn't compare to the first kiss her and her own Robin shared in the forest, that was weeks worth of buildup, and unbeknownst to them at the time, a year worth of unresolved tension. Plus she's only known this Robin _two days_ she tells herself after she pulls away. It's not the same. She knew immediately, and it makes her gut twist with guilt and a fresh pang of grief at the realization that getting her Robin back is not as easy as replacing him with a different version from an alternate reality. Soulmates be damned, it doesn't mean that real solid connection isn't needed. Fear, guilt, shame all come flooding in and Regina can barely look at the man standing in front of her. He can see right through her, he's looking at her with equal sadness and disappointment and suddenly she feels like a fool. She needs to get away from him, she needs to talk to someone. The only one she wants to talk to is Snow.

The walk back to the manor is quiet and super awkward, dusk is setting in and it's dark. Robin breaks the silence when they walk up the front steps, his hands are in his pockets and he's looking at the ground. "It's not what you expected was it?"

Well, there is no point in beating around the bush, or leading him on."No." he looks wounded, and she feels more guilt bubble in her stomach, she owes him at least an explanation, "it wasn't bad, just different. I wanted so much to believe you were the same." He nods and his brows crease in the way they do when he's upset, at least that's something in his she recognizes.

Then he says quietly, "He's a lucky man, but he's not me. I want you to give me a chance but I want you to get to know me." He pauses,she lets him continue, " I can't live in his shadow, I could never be as great of a man as he is, I feel like I'm disappointing you."

"You aren't." she reassures, but he just shakes his head.

"Regina, I can't do this." she notices that he hasn't taken any steps to come nearer to the house, she knows what this means, he's not planning on staying here."I'm perfectly fine taking care of myself. Besides this place is too noisy, I need to clear my head. You said Robin had a camp on the outskirts of town, I can manage there until this place feels more like home. I would prefer it there." This revelation that he wants to leave hits her hard, she's hurt and disappointed, but she knows she has no right feeling that way, not after what happened. Panic squeezes at her heart, and fear, fear of leaving him alone, fear of losing him again; but she also knows that he's not hers to parent- she may have brought him here but she's not responsible for him and that makes her feel suddenly helpless.

"You don't have to go, you will always have a place in my home." it's a plea really, she may not know how she feels in this moment, and she's certain she will have to come to terms with those feelings soon but she wants him to stay. She wants so much to shake these feelings and give him a chance, but the damage has already been done and she knows it.

He's made up his mind."I know and am grateful, but I think I just need to be alone for a bit until I feel more adjusted. I would prefer the small comforts I'm used to, I need to feel the air, and see the stars." He seems to sense her discomfort, he hesitation, whatever awkwardness and discord that they'd brought seems to dissipate, his demeanor softens, he gives her a reassuring, "I'll be alright."

"I'm sorry." She says apologetically, but he just nods and turns, she watches him walk down the path and disappear behind the hedges, she stands for a few long seconds just absorbing the moments that lead to this.

Regina pulls out her phone, pushes a button and the screen comes to life, it's 9:47 and she wonders if Snow is up. She dials her number. She barely lets the other women answer before asking, "Can I come over? I need to talk to someone."


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The whistle on the kettle screeches, as Snow pulls the kettle to a different burner and she switches off the stove. She gets down two cups and starts to prepare tea. "So- What happened?"

"We kissed." Regina is perched on a stool leaning up against the kitchen island in Snow's apartment. David's sound asleep in the bedroom thankfully and they can have some privacy. She's suddenly thankful for Snow's situation, the only distraction is baby Neal babbling away in his pack n' play. He's getting big enough to pull himself into a sitting position, at seven and a half months.

Snow putters, around filling mugs and pouring milk, before she joins her friend passing over a mug. "Oh yeah, and?"

Regina shifts and takes the mug, it's too hot so she just lets it sit, and stares at the wisps of steam rising from it before admitting, "It was different"

Snow doesn't wait to give her an honest dose of truth, "He's different, you realize that right?"

"Yes…..but I was also maybe hoping that.." she really doesn't want to admit what she was hoping because it's what she's been secretly scared of since she first saw him on that beach a couple days ago.

"That he would just magically be the same as the Robin you lost?" Snow doesn't beat around the bush.

"Yeah." Regina takes a sip of her tea and broods a bit before asking, "is that naive?"

Snow chuckles a bit, "You know who you are asking right?" it makes Regina smile.

"Well that's just the thing, everything just seems so easy for you and David, You are _fairytale heroes_ " The last bit is dripping with sarcasm and a bit of resentment, but Snow doesn't seem to take offense to that, Regina is glad that they have come so far in their relationship that they can have a sense of humor about it.

"You don't think we suffered? Having to break a curse every other year since your curse was broken and facing death multiple times" Regina feels a pang of anger, how many times has David cheated death but Robin, her heroic and selfless Robin, couldn't.

Regina stamps down her anger, if only for her newfound care for Snow."You always seem to make it out okay."

"And yet here were are cursed again."Snow's hand motions frantically towards the bedroom where Regina knows David is under a sleeping curse. "You may seem to think our lives are blessed because we are heroes but we are not." she chooses her words carefully, maybe she too is censoring herself for the sake of friendship, Regina thinks. "Plus you forget it was our faith in you that saved us the last time."

'I couldn't even save you from myself." Regina says regretfully.

Snow ponders for a minute, then offers,'maybe _you_ need a break from yourself."

"I already tried that remember, that other part of myself spent the last few weeks running around town causing chaos." arguably splitting herself was one of the worst choices Regina had ever made and she's spent the last couple weeks trying to fix her own mistakes.

Snow ponders that for a minute."Do you think that maybe that's half of the problem? You are missing a part of yourself."

"No." Regina shakes her head. What Snow is suggesting is a non option, she got rid of that part of herself because she doesn't want to come to terms with it. As long as she's the Evil Queen she's going to continue to lose people she loves. She doesn't regret the decision she made, despite the consequences.

Thankfully Snow doesn't push the issue, instead she changes the conversation back to him."Why don't you give him a chance, without all your expectations of what it should feel like."

"I don't know how to do that." Regina can feel tears starting to burn behind her lashes, she does her best to try and blink the tears away.

"You need to let go of Robin Hood, and get to know Robin Locksley." Snow says matter of fact.

"I don't know if I can, he's darker and angrier, and vengeful" Regina mentally recounts the look on Robin of Locksley's face when he punched Nottingham in the street. The pure unhinged rage, it terrified her.

"Hmm, that reminds me of someone." Snow takes a calculated sip of her tea. Regina doesn't miss the inflection of the action.

"I'm not that person anymore." _not really, a_ lthough she knows that's not entirely the truth. The potion had manifested the worst part of herself but she was not free of complicated human emotions, The Queen was still present even though she was physically on the other side of town and in the form of a snake. Regina knows now that nothing can make her truly escape her dark side.

"Oh, I don't know I think everything happens for a reason." Snow pauses," I think you need to come to terms with yourself before you can hope to find any common ground with him."

/

Talking to Snow was a good choice, it was what Regina needed and she has to admit to herself that it made her feel better, but it also made her realize how much she'd been avoiding her grief. Instead of walking home she found herself here in the cemetery. It must be close to midnight and the air is cold. She finds herself standing in front of his headstone, she feels a chill run up her spine. She imagines she can feel her soul pulling trying to reconnect with his but the truth is she feels nothing and that scares her.

The man she loved is gone.

"I made a mistake." she breathes into the cold air. Her breath leaves a trail that in the cold night air.

Tears burn at her eyes again but she doesn't try and stop them this time, big heavy warm tears blur her vision and rush down her cheeks. She hasn't cried, not at all since she cried over his body in her office in the shocking moments after. She'd felt numb and cold, a lack of feeling, someone could have ripped out her heart then and she wouldn't have cared. It wasn't until she saw his face again on the beach and suddenly all that emotion came rushing back to her, that's why she feels so guilty she understands. 'I thought that I could find you again…." she's sobbing, tears dripping from her jaw, her words are broken. Her heart hurts, there is a physical pain in the hollow of her chest and she lets herself feel emotions she's long been holding back and she feels like she could almost collapse with the weight of her grief. "... that we could have a second chance." her breath hitches in a sob," but he's not you and I could never replace you." she sinks to her knees at the foot of his headstone, she wants to curl up there, wants to sink down into the ground, wants to be anywhere that he is, as irrational as that is. The ice cold stone pressed against her cheek brings her around to reality, she's bawling her eyes out in the middle of the night curled up on the ground of the cemetery, if anyone saw her this weak, she'd be absolutely mortified; that thought sobers her up quick. She bites back unshed tears and tries to get her emotions under control. She pushes herself up, brushes dirt off her skirt and legs, uses her gloved fingers to wipe away tear streaks in her makeup. She mutters, "I don't know what I expected." into the darkness.

She puts her hand on his gravestone, traces the space between the letters, runs her fingers over the carved lion, "I love you, and I miss you so much." she whispers.

Her whole body hurts, her heart hurts but she pulls herself away. The truth is she didn't come here for him, she pushes the door if the crypt open, and climbs down the stairs. The air is stiff in the crypt but it feels like home. There is no lingering awkwardness here, her kiss with Robin of Locksley hadn't changed anything in the space.

She triggers a door at the bottom of the stairs that opens a secret room, one she's thankful that Robin's double didn't know about because on the other side was a cage covered in a sheet. The cage carried the cursed version of herself and she could hear a faint hissing when she entered the room. Regina mulled over what she had planned to do. She knew Snow was right, they would have to do something with her sooner or later. Regina pulled back the cover and the snake hissed in surprise, she was curled up ready to strike, when she saw it was Regina,the snake bared her fangs in a hiss and then curled up back around herself, "Calm down, Queenie." Regina sneered.

That's when she notices Robin's satchel on the other side of the chaise lounge she keeps in here; it's strange he didn't have much stuff and what he did have she'd stored away in her closet, so for this to be here was rather unexpected but it seemed to be holding something. Regina could only make out a corner of what appeared to be a book…. Not just a book… a storybook like Henry's.

Regina grabs the bag and pulls in into her lap, makes no time freeing the book, _this can't be!_

She opens the book and skims the pages, but it's nothing like she remembered, inside wasn't the story of Snow White, it was Regina's story, and not just was it Regina's story but it was Robin's story too. How they met, both in the Enchanted Forest during the missing year as well as when they met in Storybrooke. She hugs it to her chest. _Magic._

 _The storybrooke only appears to people who need it the most._ Only a page had shown up for her and Robin before, not a whole book. She remembers earlier in the day lamenting to Robin of Locksley that she had no record of her and Robin's story. _Why now?_ Regina thinks.

Her fingers skim over the pages, she flips through the book, it falls on a page, she remembers vaguely the events that transpired on the page, it was an argument, it was something she rather not be reminded of.

{Missing Year]

" _Your honor doesn't exempt you from your crimes against the crown." Regina said with contempt._

" _And what exactly are my 'crimes against the crown' your Majesty?" Robin's reply was laced with smugness, "Ensuring your people remained fed while you enacted your reign of terror."_

" _it wasn't terror it was justice!" Regina snapped._

" _Well your justice was certainly terrifying." Robin bites back._

 _His remarks spurn her rage even further, "Well, if you find me so terrifying thief, maybe you should pack up your band of drifters and go find another castle to squat in."_

Regina remembers acutely how she tried to push him away. She was hurt over the loss of her son, she wanted to cut her heart out she was in so much grief, and here he was this smug thief, always in her space, he made her feel like she was being judged being critiqued. This reminder is not a good one, she would rather look back and focus on the good things. But instead she turns the page and is shocked at what she finds, the story doesn't end on her perspective. Here on the page is Robin talking to Belle, a conversation she didn't know happened.

[Missing Year -continued]

 _Robin is pacing in the great hall in front of the fire, "I don't even know why I try."_

" _Why do you?" Belle said._

" _It seems like there is a genuine good person in there, someone I just feel like I should trust."_

 _Belle sighs, 'I've known Regina for a long time, she kept me locked up for years…"_

' _How can you trust her after that?" Robin says angrily._

This feels a bit like eavesdropping, reading this conversation, one she had no idea had ever happened. She didn't know at the time that Robin had felt that way, or that he'd cared about her that deeply in that first year. And Belle of all people saying those things. Regina remembers how she was secretly jealous of Robin and Belle during that missing year, they always had secret conversations, some even thought they were secretly together and that made Regina even more jealous, she pushed Robin away even further. Had she only known then they were talking about her.

[Missing Year -continued]

" _It's not easy, Robin. She's been hurt, she doesn't trust anyone." argues Belle._

 _Robin begins to pace again, 'She's like two different people, sometimes she's sad and kind, other times she's ornery and cruel, some days I don't know which I'm going to get."_

 _Belle straightens, "That's always going to be the struggle with caring for Regina, trust me it's hard to love someone who only sees themselves as a monster, no matter how much you think you could hate her for what she's done, she hates herself more. " She comforts._

' _Thank you Belle. I appreciate being able to talk about this with you."_

" _Anytime. Please do us all a favor and stop provoking her?" Belle asks._

' _I'll try." Robin confides._

" _Just give her a chance." Belle pleads._

Regina closes the book, she doesn't need to read anymore, she knows that she will have to deal with the Queen, but it's late so she packs up the book back in Robin's satchel and picks up the cage, she doesn't bother walking she poofs herself home, anything she needs to do she can deal with tomorrow.


End file.
